We pay attention to others insofar as we do not know ourselves and insofar as they try to bribe us subtly with certain promises like, “If only you conform, things will be so much better for you!”   If we do not know ourselves, it is very good to get some feedback.  To my mind that need to orient oneself in the world through interactions with others comprises much of the “difficult crossing” of shamanism in the Nietzschean sense — which is the bridge to individuality and self-ownership.   On the second issue, we also have to get beyond our reflexive responsiveness to authority or people posing as an authority on a subject, because otherwise we make ourselves susceptible to their empty promises.  We need to be the ones who promise for ourselves, and our own guarantor.   Mastering both these aspects required intense courage and deep self-knowledge.

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