I’m still reading books calls Postcolonial books. They give me some insights, here and there. Part of this involves cultural laundering. So much of the past was oppressive for those who were colonised. Yet, if what Fanon describes as psychological violence is closely examined in its abstract sense, then I have been a victim of often relentless psychological violence. I’m not supposed to be identifiable thus as a racial victim, since my skin is light. Still, so many of my encounters have involved attempts to violently re-educate me. For what? When I was in Zimbabwe, I was pretty much attuned to a very non-affluent lifestyle. I had friends who were black and white. I had not yet encountered the exaggerated form of racism which was later attributed to me, I suppose, because of where I was from. Systematic racism I knew nothing about from personal experience. My school age friends did not express such attitudes in terms of categorising others. It was my western experience, much later, which educated me about that, by attributing nefarious motives to me, making me feel awkward and self-conscious. But as I said, in my prior, very casual state of mind, I used to mix freely with whomever I wanted to. Western re-education — and that alone — has made me cautious.
